some things change

It is absolutely incredible to look back over the past year and see how drastically different life looks. Some changes were good. Some changes broke my heart. Some changes made me stronger. Some I still don't understand and may never will. But, I can always find comfort in the fact that whatever the change, I know His greater plan is being fulfilled and all these things will work for the good of those who love Him.

I haven't posted in a while, as my sister notified me yesterday so here is an update on my changes:

a. i have a big girl job

2. i am slowly becoming fluent in Spanglish

d. i won the Christmas door decorating contest at work - yes, my door was phenomenal

5. i found out that i am going to get my lactation certification in February (i was randomly picked as one of the dietitians to attend) I can only contribute this to the Lord. Obviously, he thinks I would be the bomb at teaching women to breastfeed. :)

8. one of my bestest friends, lacey, moved out and went home to NC

e. one of my bestest friends, elizabeth, moved in her place

b. i have taken up crocheting and i might not be too terrible at it

4. i have the most awesomest friends and family ever but maybe you already knew that

c. i love Jesus more today than I did yesterday

I think that just about covers it for big changes. No marriage. No babies. No moving. Just sitting back and watching the world change around me and attempting to stay faithful to the changes the Lord has for me. 

Panty hose optional?

September was a loooonnggg month where I really couldn't find joy in much. That doesn't mean that it wasn't there. My eyes were just closed to it. October has been good for my restless heart. He is so faithful to provide in our dark hours-people, prayer, hope. So, that is my summary for not writing for the past month and a half. :)

However, much has happened over the past month. One huge thing was that I died. Okay, I didn't really die but it felt like it. I left my job as a hostess, and I never knew how much people loved me until I was leaving. Sometimes they wouldn't let me go to the bathroom. They always enjoyed food from the kitchen while I stood at the front usually starving. Occasionally, they forgot to let me go to lunch. Overall, I really wasn't sure they cared too much about me at all until the week I was leaving. I thought to myself, "Is this what it is like when people die?" They told me that they were going to miss me so much and that I was the best hostess they ever had (big hairy deal...I know). Leaving is bitter sweet. I will miss the people, but definitely not the hostessing.

The best news is that I started my new job yesterday, and I L-O-V-E it. I have never experienced such a positive work atmosphere that truly cared about their employees. I have my own office with a door AND a lucite door box-for those of you who are confused:

I thank my internship director for teaching me the correct term.

I get to help people all day long. I get an hour for lunch. I get holidays off....all of them. I have an amazing supervisor. I can leave early any day I want as long as I flex my time on other days. But most importantly: 

Can you read that?? Yes, that says "hose are optional."

I have been wearing those puppies for one year and three months now, and I hate them so much! No more panty hose for me! You might be thinking, "Lauren, what are you going to do with all of your old pairs?" Well I have some ideas: make those pets that my Gran use to make using knee highs and googly  eyes, use them as katie and I use to when we wanted to act like robbers and smoosh our faces, sift flour?, strain just about anything....I feel like the possibilities are endless. So, if you were looking to hook me up with some panty hose for Christmas, Mom, maybe you should try underwear instead? 

My very simple joy: no more panty hose. oh and maybe my eyes being opened again. :)

Cupcake and Marriage

When I go into work, I park in a parking garage and walk a couple of blocks to get to the hotel. On my walk, I feel like the same things happen to me every morning. I speed walk across the middle of the streets paying no attention to the nearby crosswalks. I walk over a vent that blows my hair and my skirt up...I still haven't learned. I admire the large painted mural on the side of a building. AND I say hello to two of my precious homeless friends. Usually, I just get a "Good morning sweetheart, how are you?" but today was exceptionally sweet!

Today as I walked past my friend who is sitting on the same bench every morning and every afternoon with his backpack and sleeping bag covered in bird droppings from the trees he is sitting under, he greets me with, "Good morning cupcake, hope you have a good day!" I smiled ear to ear from the time he said that all the way into work. It is weird how simple words can make your day. He called me cupcake! For the past two months I have worked there, he has never called me cupcake!

Then, as I was leaving work today, I passed my other homeless friend, who harassed me for days last month until I  brought him some cheerios and milk. He came walking up to me and followed me halfway to the parking deck trying to convince me to marry him. He made me give him one good reason why I wouldn't marry him. My answer: "Because I don't want to get married." Good answer...I know. He finally turned around after he asked, "Well, can we at least be friends?" I said, "Absolutely." His response was to that, "Okay sweetheart, see you tomorrow morning."

Some tell me to be careful. Some tell me not to talk to them. Some tell me not to give them breakfast. But at the end of the day, these are the people that truly know how to brighten my day. How can I ignore them? I can't.

My simple joy for the day: being loved and cared for by homeless strangers. 

Napping

I am finally no longer a student and I am not quite sure what to do with myself. The list is limitless....

sewing, reading, spending time with people I love,

watching movies, knitting, crafting, running,

playing ultimate frisbee, spending more time with the Lord,

going for walks, cleaning my house, cooking, and let's not forget

NAPPING!

So this picture is from high school....just wanted you to get a visual of me sleeping. :)

Today was the first time in what feels like nearly five years that I took a nap and didn't wake up with my heart racing. I was never able to take naps because every time I did I would wake up with an anxiety that I needed to be somewhere, needed to do something, or that I just didn't deserve a nap. That might seem silly, but it happened to me a lot. I was told that this was a sign of anxiety and obviously it wasn't natural. I would just never give myself grace or cut myself a break. Do you know the saying, "I'm my own worst enemy?" Well, I really am.

I am excited about what this new life looks like for me. More naps. Less anxiety. And more grace for myself.

My simple joy for the day: a nap free from worry.

My People

A close friend of mine from Auburn got married this weekend. It was a great excuse for us to all be together again, and it was amazing community. I was able to spend so much quality time with "my people." I am not sure if that makes sense to anyone but me, but "my people" are those that I don't have to try around. Sometimes it gets exhausting meeting new people and trying so hard to show them who you are, but with these specific people, I can be completely myself without holding anything back.

The Crew

We can:

laugh about very inappropriate things, talk about bodily functions,

cry because another one is married, have our hair played with,

drink too much wine, dance like fools and then,

do a choreographed dance for the all wedding guests,

wrestle a wedding dress in order for someone to go to the restroom,

draw numbers to see who will get married next, talk about our

dreams,

talk about our fears, speak of the Lord often, and

hold tight to memories that made us who we are

And at the end of the night (3:00am), we all know that no matter where we go or who we become we will always have a special place in each others hearts.

O and Liz managed to sneakily make is on my camera

My simple joy for the weekend: my people

Jim Hartman

I moved into a new house this Tuesday and I absolutely LOVE it! It was a bit of a risk signing the lease back in July because the house reeked of cig smoke and looked a little rough. But, we had faith(and vision) and decided to sign!

The house turned out beautifully!!! Not only do I live in an awesome house, I also live with three amazing ladies who I love, annnnd I can talk to from the basement through the ventilation system! :)

Yesterday, we heard a knock on our front door. When we opened the door, there was a sweet man holding a huge bouquet of hydrangeas! It was our sweet neighbor Mr. Jim Hartman, ~60 years of age and retired, welcoming us to the neighborhood with flowers from his garden.

We decided to display our flowers in our Christmas tree window.

And the winner of my simple joy for the day is Mr. Jim Hartman!

A Sweet Question

My best friend since kindergarten, Lauren, got engaged on the 4th of July. I was so excited for her when I got a text message of a hand with a beautiful ring on it telling me that my "La" was engaged. Although I had been asking and expecting it for months now, it totally took me by surprise. And it made me remember all of the times we shared together....

tying our identical (put different colored) coats together in recess.

making up dance routines to "come on ride the train" in mamaw's front yard.

twirling batons together on livingston hill.

making up absurd videos including "candy and katrina's workout video".

riding four wheelers by the carpet shack.

getting sunburned and watching the fireworks at MacFarland on the 4th of July.

getting smashies for/with mamaw.

making pallets on the floor every night with the turtle quilt.

eating pancakes on sunday mornings.

putting water balloons in our bathing suits and jumping on the trampoline.

sliding down the stairs into my basement and putting a whole in the wall.

being co-captains of the majorette squad.

listening to sweetness in starlight and crying as we knew we were leaving for college.

living a few doors down our freshman year of college.

being there for the heart break when the boyfriends were gone-thank goodness.

being there when the husband was found.

So naturally, I might have cried when La handed me this today:

My simple joy for the day: being asked to be the maid of honor in my best la's wedding. Love you, la!

A Blessing in Disguise

I was very bummed because I was suppose to go to Fair Hope this weekend to spend time with Michelle and her family, but I couldn't go because of financial constraints. :(

Well, my dear friend Lacey reminded my on Friday about the Jamboree, a National Championship for Country Musician Beginners in Smithville, TN complete with an evening fiddle-off. So, Saturday night we set off on our adventure to the sweet, country town of Smithville. It was a little over an hour away but totally worth the trip.

I didn't realize that not only would there be music but dancing too. There was square dancing, clogging, buck dancing, and my person favorite, the old-fashioned flat foot. Here is a sneak peak of the winner of the flat foot dancing competition:
...and he just might have been the oldest flat footer too!

The Jamboree including all of the yummy foods that you could possibly think of. We had bbq sandwiches, homemade peach ice cream, and......

...the best combination of sweet and salty - kettle corn.

The end of the evening consisted of a fiddle-off between the senior fiddle champion and junior fiddle champion. The junior fiddler won! He was so talented! Here is a sneak peak of his final number:

Then came the wonderful starry night trip back to Nashville. We rode with the windows down and I sat in the back seat curled up in a large quilt looking at the stars. It was beautiful.

"By the word of the Lord were the heavens made, their starry host by the breath of his mouth." Psalm 33:6

My simple joy for the day: a precious flat footer, good food, and music that warms my heart.

Sobbing to Jesus

I worked at sifat this past week as a special project for the last week of my internship. It was definitely crazy but awesome! I only went to worship one night and while the campers broke off into small groups after worship, I just laid down in the q-hut to have a minute with the Lord. I asked one of my new sweet friends/the worship leader this summer to play a good song while we waited for the campers to get finished and this is what she chose:

As I laid there thinking about this song, I just thought about how truly beautiful Jesus is and how differently I look from Him. Tears rolled down my face as I listened to the words of this song.

"I know that Your eyes are like flames of fire.

I know that Your head is white as wool.

And I know that your voice, it sounds like waters.

Jesus, You're beautiful."

On my way home, I listened to this song in my car (I might have asked her to burn me a cd before I left camp). I am sure the people driving around me thought I was a complete lunatic because I was literally sobbing/jamming out to this song at the top of my lungs. Man, He is so beautiful.

My simple joy for the day: being saved by such a beautiful Jesus.

Summer Sunday Lunch

I am a little late with this post, but I really wanted to share. :)

(O, I'm wearing the dress you gave me, but rest assured that I

only took my sweater off when I got home)

Sunday afternoons with my family at home are second to none. They mean good food, time spent together, and usually, quite a bit of laughter (Gran said, "I am losing my........and then lost her train of thought which gave Dad an insert here moment. He whispered to me "hearing"). Well this Sunday was one of my favorite family traditions of sitting on the back porch to eat lunch.

Originally mom asked me to check if it was too hot to eat outside, but quickly changed her mind to ask dad because she knew no matter what I would say it felt perfect. We decided to eat outside because even though it was a bit warm, it felt good in the shade under the umbrella.

Looks like I was a big hungry and yes that is watermelon. :)

My simple joy for Sunday: time with family, yummy food, and laughter.

The Things Kids Say

Today I ate lunch with about 30 kindergarteners at a local elementary school. I sat by my new, little 5-year-old friend Katherine.

After asking me where I was from four times, she finally told me she was from Honduras. When I asked her where in Honduras and started offering the names of the cities I knew, she asked me why I was talking like that. Apparently, I am not too good at pronouncing the names of Honduran cities.

Then, she told me she had a cousin from Vietnam and her cousin was teaching her to speak Vietnam. Next, she told me she had a cousin from China. Naturally, I am a bit skeptical at this point.

And then came the best cousin of all. She apparently also had a cousin from Barackobama. Yes, it came out of her mouth as one word "Barackobama." I am really not sure where that country is, and I had to turn my head and giggle after asking her to repeat what she said twice.

My simple joy for the day: learning about new countries from new friends.

Time with Him

I don't really like to exercise alone, but sometimes that is just what my heart needs...if I do it right. Today this is what my exercising looked liked:

1. Making a "Time with Him" playlist on my ipod (I did this because my mind tends to wander on things not of Him when I am walking alone.)

2. Found a beautiful trail outside

3. Forgot everything I was leaving behind, including the ever worrisome thought of, "What am I doing with my life?"

4. Listened to the water running in the creek or the guy playing guitar by himself by the creek

5. Took in the amazing scent of these along the way...

6. Picked a flower

7. Stopped to watch the sun going down

8. Found the Lord in it all

My simple joy for the day: taking time to spend with Him and stopping to take in the beauty along the way.

Sweet Baby Girl

This is Elsie Grace Rose. She is one of my dear friends' baby and also happens to be my pastor's daughter. She is their forth child and just as awesome as the other three.

I got to hold her for a long time tonight at community group while she slept. I have never watched a pregnancy as close as I watched Jill's, and this sweet baby girl reminds me of the pure, perfect miracles sent from above. I love her so much!

(My hair is courtesy of Bethany, their 6-year-old daughter.)

My simple joy for the day: getting to experience a miracle happen before my eyes and snuggling with her.

Don't let anyone tell you that you are too old.

If you look really closely, you can see a sweet 80-year-oldish looking man standing on the railing with a fishing pole hanging into the very small creek running below (I felt like a creeper taking this picture).

This is the second time I have seen this sweet little guy. The last time I saw him he was doing the exact same thing, and I asked him if he had any catches. He had actually caught four very small fish that day. I asked him if he was going to eat them and he looked at me like I was nuts. He said he was going to feed them to his cat. That is one lucky cat! He made me smile again today and I thought I would share.

My simple joy for the day: never being too old to climb on a bridge and dangle your fishing pole into a creek.

Delayed But Oh, So Joy-filled

This past weekend my family came to visit and we had such a good time together. We started off our journey at this beautiful spot that overlooks the city, Lover's Circle:

I might have made poor arthritic Gran climb a really steep hill to get there. She was a trooper.

After our wonderful view we went to the Scarritt-Bennett Center. It was originally founded in Kansas City, Missouri as a school to train young women missionaries, and it was moved to Nashville in 1924. Two of Gran's aunts went to this school before embarking on their oversees missions. I took tons of pictures but here are two:

You probably can't read the engraving over the fireplace. I might have sat in the floor to write it down because for some reason I felt some connection to what it said:

"Wheresoever the gospel

shall be preached

through the whole world

that also which

this woman hath done

shall be spoken of

for a memorial of her."

It was so awesome to be at a place where two brave women from my family were trained to be missionaries. Someday soon I hope to follow their footsteps.

The weekend with the fam was so jammed packed. We went to my friend's organic farm, an Earth Day festival at the park, fed some ducks my old stale bread, and ended the day with some beverages and dancing at the Wild Horse Saloon. Emma had a little too much fun I think! I would have added pictures of the other fun things we did , but I just wanted

to highlight the two things that were extra special to me. :)

My simple joys from the weekend: spending time with the people I love, breathtaking views of the city, and a historic place that gives me hope for my calling.

My P.S. simple joy is that I got baptized on Easter Sunday. Something that was definitely long overdue. That's my friend Robert in the background. He got baptized too!

Free

So, I haven't decided how much I am going to post. I think a goal of everyday is unrealistic. Even every other day is a bit too lofty of a goal for me. I actually had no intention of posting today because I have so much work to catch up on. I don't need to waste my time blogging right?

Weeelll, I decided to go to my new favorite coffee shop to do my work because I just can't seem to bring myself to do work at my house. I ordered my new favorite beverage, which was this yummy drink:

A soy latte (don't worry it was decaf at this time of night)

As I was reaching into my wallet to pull out my debit card, I was told to put my money away and given a very sweet smile. I was so confused, but my heart was smiling on the inside. And this is why I had to post today. :)

My simple joy for the day: free decaf soy latte and a smile.

Music, Windows Down, and $100 Tea

It was not the most beautiful day in Nashville, but if you look on the bright side, at least it didn't rain. Due to the lack of rain I enjoyed some driving around Vanderbilt with the windows down listening to The Wood Brothers. I heard in a sermon once that some languages have trouble translating the word "joy." The translation they give joy is a dancing heart. This is the song that made my heart dance today:

Annd for anyone who remembers me purchasing a very small amount of tea for $100, well, I enjoyed some tonight. I think I am getting my moneys worth because this lavender tea made my night!

My simple joys for the day: listening to good music with the windows down and worth while hot tea.

Rain, Coffee, and A New Dress

Yesterday, I told my friend Lisa I would run with her at 7:30 in the morning. First of all, I don't usually run in the morning and I also usually don't run with people (strictly because I am too embarrassed of my slowness). When I woke this morning, this was the forecast that greeted me on weather.com:

BUT, I decided to make my way to Lisa's house anyway. What's a little rain right? Well, I think I have decided that running in the rain is one of my new found joys! Only next time, I won't wear a white t-shirt...

On my way home from work today, I stopped off at this sweet little shop, which has been on my to-do list for quite a while because I really wanted to buy some good, quality coffee.

One of the owners said he, his dad, and his brother laid the bricks for the shop in 1979, and the business had been going strong ever since. I decided to buy a small bag of dark latte blend. We will see if I like it. I love supporting local businesses!!

Another stop Lisa and I made on the way home from work was at a store called the Fashion Exchange. All the boutiques in the area are super expensive so we thought this one would be too, but we were so wrong! There were such unique things and we were so pumped about our new find! I bought this dress for $15.

My simple joys for the day: running in the rain, new coffee, and finding secret shops.